Dick Cheney, One Of The Most Heartless Bastards Gets Heart Transplant

Dick Cheney, the former Vice President of the United States is one of the most heartless bastards in recent memory. In fact, he was perceived to be so heartless, that he acquired the nickname Darth Vader. This week, in the greatest example of irony since the awful song “Isn’t It Ironic” by Alanis Morissette, Dick Cheney got himself a heart transplant. Now, the word “transplant” would imply the he had a heart to begin with – I for one an skeptical that he had one, but lets for the moment assume he did. If he did indeed have a heart, that would mean that science is attempting to succeed where nature (Or God) has failed, and that is, to replace an awful heart, with a good heart. It’s worth a shot I guess. Maybe if this were done ten years ago, we could have avoided endless wars, tragic deaths of innocent women and children and exploding poverty rates. But I for one don’t believe a new heart will dramatically change Dick Cheney from evil to good, for that, we need to consider giving him a soul transplant. Unfortunately, science just isn’t there yet.